So today was a really hard day for me, no particular reason, I was just tired and emotional and sick. So I decide to end the day with a hot shower. I don't have a large shower, but I haul in the stool the girls use to brush their teeth and take a seat and embrace the hot water, then like I have all weekend, I cry. I think to myself, I'm tired of looking like this, I'm tired of being bald, I'm tired of my sagging boob and 6 inch scar, not to mention the dimples and 2 inch scar over my right breast from my port, I'm tired of smelling metal, and so on and so on I go through this exhausting list, and as I am crying and dry heaving I realize, this is just one chapter of my life, my story does not end here. And all became calm. I picked up my amazing grace body wash and I was ok. I still feel sick and nauseous, but this is only a very short chapter of my life.
4 comments:
Well said! Amen! <3
Yes this is just one chapter and there are plenty more to come that will be full of amazing stories of your kids and future grandkids. We will live our dream of being old women sipping tea catching up and comparing notes on raising kids/grandkids, marriage, work/retirement etc.
Sending positive vibes your way =) =) =) =) =) =) =)
sending big hugs your way. wish there was a fast fwd button you could press to get through this faster. -Jeni
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