So, I have looked more like me for a while. My hair had grown back, my scars have healed (and are mostly hidden), I no longer look like I had cancer. But when I looked in the mirror, all I would see was my bad hair. My ugly post cancer, post chemo hair.
I have said it before, for me, the worst part of cancer treatment was losing my hair. It was more traumatizing than losing by breasts or my ovaries. And as grateful as I have been for more longer being bald, my hair was awful. It was frizzy and coarse. I have been pulling it back into a tiny bobby pined ponytail for weeks because it has been so unmanageable.
But that all changed on Tuesday when my mom offered to help me pay for a Brazillian blowout. Now my hair looks and feels beautiful and healthy. Even my husband noticed. My daughter said I look like I did before. I now look in the mirror, I see me, the old, undamaged me but with a new appreciation of life.